Drinking in Class

One of my courses in the Brewmaster program at Olds College is this little gem known as Sensory Evaluation.  And yes, this class is pretty much what it sounds like; we evaluate beers.  It is very easy to imagine that this class is a sort of circus with 26 people sitting around getting drunk and talking about beer.  The truth is, as lovely as that sounds, there is a lot going on in this course.  In fact, it is this course that makes me most nervous when it comes time for exams.  You might not believe me, but sensory evaluation is hard.  If we are going to be able to make good beer it is essential that we learn to recognize what it is that makes a beer good or bad.  It means being really critical about everything that is going on in that beautiful glass and training ourselves to consistently understand and recognize what it is we perceive.  It takes practice.

"Oh, good one." You sarcastically reply. "The homework must be arduous."  And yes, of course you are right.  Every time I take a sip, I do consider it homework, except, now that includes every drink of water, beer, wine, spirits, soda, or juice.  It is nearly impossible to just shut my brain off and enjoy a simple beer in peace.  Whats worse, sometimes we need to test things in class that are just down right unpleasant. It is arguably more important to be able to recognize the first indication of spoilage or contamination than the wonder of a perfect blend of hops. Now, this does not mean I am looking for sympathy here, I just want to make sure that you understand that sensory class is not all unicorns and rainbows.  Furthermore, I am going to attempt something waaaaay ahead of its time.  You are going to be able to detect and even rank some taints in beer samples that are invisible to the naked eye.  Over the Internet.  And even though I have already tested these samples, I promise that you will not get any of my germs.  Ready for sensory class? Let us begin.

I taste like beer!

I taste like <censored>

Here are two typical samples of beer (well, after I've tasted them that is).  One of these beers has been spiked with salt, the other has not.  Can you break the Internet and tell which one tastes like the ocean and could make you want to be sick? If you are really not sure, you can highlight the space under the picture for the answer.

You're impressed, right?  Now lets up the ante.  Each one of these beers has been spiked with a varying amount of sulphur (and yes, that tastes as good as it sounds).  Your task is to rank each sample from the lowest to the highest intensity of unpleasantness.  I was going to write some fancy html code that would allow you to actually move the samples but that would have delayed this blog by a month or more, so just do it out loud and forget whatever the people around you might be thinking.

Sulphury,        Sulphuryer,            Sulphuryerer,               Sulphuryest!

Well, there you have it.  You can actually taste beer over the Internet.  Don't you just feel like a brave, new pioneer?   Don't worry, I'll try to have something that tastes a little better next time.
Until then, Cheers!